Page 315
April 2nd, 2012

Page 315

Oh Lech, your ulterior motives will likely come back to haunt you :)  Pirate spray sounds like an incredibly fun product that could easily be abused… but it is just Crack’s favorite brand of disinfectant.  And since some of you seem to get such a kick out of my ongoing saga of sleeplessness here’s yet another fun update: both twins ‘slept’ through the night, then Sam woke up crying and snuffly around 3 am the next night, disturbing the twins, and was running a mild fever by morning.  Sambit was better today but both of the twins were up most of the night last night with runny noses and stuffy breathing.  Stay tuned to find out if they -wait for it- BOTH have a fever tomorrow and we have a really fun couple of days!  Yay!

And last but not least is a really fun recent commission of the Star Wars universe’s much under appreciated hero: an Ewok Jedi!


  1. Soundwave the Unchresomatic

    I guess we’ll never know…

  2. Kurobara

    Hm, I guess Lech doesn’t like to kiss and tell…Oh well, I suppose Crack just did that for him.

  3. Blacky Blackerson

    Oh Lech! Keep those crazy antics up and you’ll die of AIDS before the female bears arrive! Oh, and with all that disinfectant Crack is spraying, Lech should be worried about “it” being inactive from now on.

    Well, now that this arc is over, we can focus on Crack’s long overdue arc. Wonder what’s going to happen.

    Ah Nerd, the victim of more humiliation. He will never get a break especially considering that he is extremely weak and often cowardly (still awesome though). He shouldn’t feel too bad though, they technically got “gangbanged” too, if not harder.

    And speaking of which, I doubt this will be the last we see of the polars. Well, hopefully it won’t; we really didn’t see a full resolution to the situation. In fact, what did happen after Gay and Gimp jumped in? They came out untouched and everything. What, was the gayness and sadism levels so high that it couldn’t be shown? If that’s the case, that doesn’t really surprise me.

  4. Aps

    Hahahahaha…hilarious :D Love all that spraying going on…great lead-in for the next arc! :)

  5. Spot

    Uhm… Not to be nitpicky, but, in panel two, is it meant to say “Rofl”? Because right now it says “Rolf”.
    Just saying.

  6. Hi

    Hm, we don’t why Lech did it. But also, why did Gay seem worried about Lech. Still want to know why. But I guess some of us want to let our imaginations run wild. Great arc.

  7. Kehno

    Oh dear Lech. We know you are the jock of the pack but.. a monkey? :D

  8. alexander B

    Alison has previously mentioned and hinted in the comic that he’ll pretty much bang anything with a vag , also it looks like the fans aren’t the only ones to joke about the rapey nature of nerd being captured lol.

  9. Sterling Rodd

    Last three frames… exxxxxxxxxxxxxxxactly. :)

  10. Sterling Rodd

    @Hi — I don’t really have a solid basis for this… just their physical similarities, their mutual focus on sexual identity, and the abrasive nature of their relationship… but I’m personally persuaded Gay and Lech are brothers. I haven’t seen anything about their histories yet that would strictly rule it out.

    @Kehno — they’re all just jealous that Lech is such a Wyld Stallion!!! (diddly diddly diddly air guitar shred… uh, am I dating myself too much here?) :)

    I like how Lech managed to back down from the “gangbang” suggestion and still work “went down” into his reply. Clever psyche out there.

  11. Sidero

    Crack fits perfectly in the background that is ready to spray Lech at every silence!
    I like the shout of Nerd in the 2nd panel, it seems that the balloon is trying to hit Lech and Evil.
    @Sterling Rodd — I like your theory i never thought about that. In fact they look like opposite-brothers type

  12. Sterling Rodd

    @alexander B — “Alison has previously mentioned and hinted in the comic that he’ll pretty much bang anything with a vag”

    She also previously mentioned (Nov. 14, 2001; p. 295) in commentary that… that monkey? He’s a GUY. :)

    What about it, Lech? Dun dun DUUUUUNNNNN!!! “Lech” indeed. :) Pirate spray, yar!!!

    And where does Evil get off giving anybody else THAT look? He’s the one wandering around rubbing dolls on everyone else’s anal glands, after all. There are less lascivious ways to scent mark things, after all… but he went with THAT.

  13. Sterling Rodd

    Bah, I meant 2011, not 2001.

    I really like the BLT on the bun couch sandwich. It would be a real shame if one of the BNs (Tanked?) reached down and made a snack of it, but… we’ve seen worse carnage in the strip so far. :)

  14. kath

    going back to the Tank Arc, his mother had the same colorization and markings as him, but not his eyes, As blue is recessive, he would probably get it from his father. The only ones with blue eyes are Gay, and Crack. and I can sort of see a famly resemblence from them.

    Tossing in a note regarding the monkeys… It wouldn’t have had to have been *that* monkey- and, well, they are animals, – sometimes, it just doesn’t matter to them…

    about the babies. You know if you have them sleeping through the night, your going to be getting up anyway to check on them. You may as well have company while you are up. :D

    Let us Spray.

  15. iamry

    I’m still having fun pretending it’s pirate spray. DON’T SPRAY POLLY LIKE THAT! YAARRRR

  16. Sterling Rodd

    I think pirate spray is the best meme to come out of the strip since STOMPGASM. :)

  17. Kent83

    Well, whatever his reasons, Lech scored points with me. ^^ Even though he probably had ulterior motives, i still prefer to think that he, indeed, has a heart in addition to attitude. :)

  18. iamry

    @Sterling Rodd – Hooray! I made a meme. …Er, I mean. SHIVER ME’ TIMBERS!

  19. raeByppilF

    Lech molests monkeys XD
    “ROLF”? Don’t you mean “ROFL” (Rolling On Floor Laughing)
    Oh, perhaps you mean they’re laughing like this guy:

  20. Kurobara


  21. Sterling Rodd

    @raeByppilF “Lech molests monkeys XD”

    No surprises there, that a barrel of monkeys can feature just fine in Lech’s idea of a fun Saturday night… we already knew Lech is into primates, right? :) But I don’t think he’s the molesting sort. Rambunctious, bumbling romancing, sure. I picture Pepe le Pew only much jerkier. :)

  22. gamehunter


  23. RuntyTiger

    Ooh… not fun… I hope your kids will get well soon. The shirts looks awesome and too cute.

  24. Zermel

    Did Crack just ROLF? “Ruin Our Lech’s Fertility”

  25. Sterling Rodd

    @Zermel For Evil it’s “Realizations On Lech’s F– ummmm… F… F… F… …Filanderings!!” (yes, I know, philandering isn’t spelled with an F… work with me here!)

  26. Draco

    Hope your kids turn out alright and as for Nerd when did he get gangbanged. One last thing can you do Crack in the next arc?

  27. Zermel

    @Sterling Rodd: How is it that you never cease to amaze me?
    @Draco: I don’t think I understood that “can you do crack in the next arc” I thought she had these already drawn out and ready to upload,or am I just stupid?And by the name of the next chapter which you can read in the archive, kinda looks like a Crack chapter already.Im not trying to be rude either,I don’t always understand things the first time I see it.

  28. Nicole

    @Zermel: Yes, Alison has these done pretty far in advance…otherwise I don’t think we’d be getting updates what with Sambit and the twins. :D

    I REALLY don’t want to know about the monkey. Just….no.

  29. Beta

    Ewok Jedi is one of the coolest things I’ve seen in a while. You definitely must put that on your facebook vote incentives Album so I can reference to it every once in a while. Man is that cool!

    I also don’t think ROLF was a mistake. I don’t think it’s supposed to be an acronym like ROFL is. I’ve seen ROLF used before in verb tense for a quick outburst in laughter. I could be wrong though and it could be a typo. I’d like to think it isn’t.

  30. Zermel

    @Beta: Rolf means to vomit too. Though that pirate spray might cause some of that on Monday.

  31. FoxieDragon

    Ewok Jedi needs to be made into a shirt! <3

  32. ZevDamian

    I am suprised no one has made the joke yet… the reason he wanted to help the monkey was… he enjoys spanking his monkey XD lol

  33. hm

    Love the comic, I think Nerd is my favourite. I really, really, really like the batman and catwoman tshirt and signed up for an account to vote for it.

  34. Zankou

    I needed this avatar it represents my pain.

    almost a week later i just noticed the blt couch picture rodd was talking about.. even though its “right” below the comic.

  35. Sterling Rodd

    @Kankou — It must have been a confusing week for you. :) If my innocuous comment sent you on a four-day “Where’s Waldo” sandwich-seeking adventure, peering through a magnifying glass at every pixel in the comic, well… no, I’m not sorry, I’m highly amused. :)

  36. Zankou

    *new avatar* those two sentences were actually ment to be non related but it works in a funny way lol

  37. Taniioko

    Why does it say ROLF. o-o”

    ROFL, is it not meant to be?

  38. stepchildofsoul

    Dang! For some reason, I can’t open that Jedi Ewok link. Is it cute? It’s cute, isn’t it?


    Just remember it all started with the Beatles, but then Sabbath took over.

  40. Cam

    I knew something had to be between Lech and that monkey. I guess that means it was a girl? Or does Lech not really care? A true chance for Glech!?

) Your Reply...