Page 881
May 1st, 2023

Page 881

STILL dealing with house sale… :( we’ve had tons of showings and mostly positive feedback and apparently it’s a seller’s market and there’s not a lot of inventory and yet, no one’s going all the way with offers. It’s been almost a month and I am so sick of cleaning. AND our dryer drum is cracked so there’s a lovely new wrinkle. FUN.

Twins have a bake sale on Friday so now we’re going to do some experimenting to see what they want to take…which makes me have covid lockdown flashbacks… yay MORE calories!


They smiled, all teeth and menace. One pushed closer, beady eyes glittering under a heavy brow. “Look around ladies. No elephant bitch here to save you this time.”

A large clawed paw came in to grab her, or maul her, or whatever he intended, but Sara heaved a water logged breath and concentrated. The paw slowed, like he was fighting her, or maybe he was confused. They both looked a bit confounded but there was no trace of purple in their gaze. Sara grit her teeth. She was sweating and shaky but since she was drenched and cold it was hard to tell. Cara knew there was something wrong though. She grabbed Sara’s shoulder and dug her claws in lightly. Sara reached up and grabbed her sister’s paw, squeezing hard. She bit her lip and pushed, but Sludge and Dipshit loomed closer, glaring at her and running their tongues over yellowed fangs. Sara’s knees were wobbling and Cara shifted her weight in alarm, her support now holding Sara up. The polar’s jaws widened in anticipation, bathing the girls in a waft of carrion breath. Sara could feel her sister’s body lock up, could hear Cara’s breath catch in horror-

Then an obnoxious honking broke the stand off. Murder arrived in a flurry of beating wings and angry bleating. The polars jerked back in surprise, claws up to protect their eyes. Murder could do a lot of damage when he was motivated.


  1. murphy

    Murder the Goose, I love that!

  2. Nicole

    Huzzah for Murder! :) I mean…lol!

  3. Kath McGill

    Your welcome to use this for the bake sale. I used mini M&Ms the first time I made it. If you don’t have them, extra chocola chips will do.

    Salty Sea turtles.
    1 bag family sized chocolate chip cookie mix + ingredients to make.
    8 oz m&m
    8oz caramel candy (quartered)
    8 oz pecan halves (do not cut)

    Use non stick cooking spray on 13x9x1 disposable baking pan.
    Combine all ingredients and place into pan. Push cookie dough into every corner and top with a tiny pinch of ground sea salt.

    Bake as directed on cookies mix. cookies will be done when tooth pick comes out clean.

    Cut into 1×1/2 inch bars when warm but leave in pan for transportation.

  4. Todd Maccarone

    So, it’s “Goose ex Machina”, eh? Interesting… Also, good to know Sara’s super-musk has it’s limits. But it seems we’re short one polar- where’s Steven?

  5. Cam

    Hell hath no fury like a Canadian goose scorned.

    @Alison: Rice crispy treats are an easy customizable treat that should sell well. (Well, they’re the ones I’m always tempted to buy at least…) There’s tons of different flavors or ways to make them. To make them stand out adorabley at a bake sale, you could stick popsicle sticks into them, cut them to the shape of posicles, and dip them in different flavored icings. Rice crispy popsicle treats.

  6. T-Shaw

    Saved by Murder!

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